Friday, October 16, 2009
no, i'm not about to spill the beans about someone else. actually, it's about me.
more than 2 decades ago, when i started training to specialise, i exposed patients to unnecessary risks.
a few times.
in the 1st instance, i was dealing with a child who was the 1st case in the morning. i later left the care of the child to a nurse while i stepped out to read the papers. it was not the 1st time i did this but on this occasion, i was caught red-handed by a visiting consultant, who came weekly to provide clinical services & conduct teaching sessions. she gently reprimanded me & i appreciated her discretion for that. since that day, i've not touched the papers till all work had been done.
in the 2nd incident, i was involved in a nasty disagreement with another doctor about how a patient should be managed. out of annoyance, i stormed out of the room, again leaving...er...or more like abandoning the patient. the other doctor complained to my boss, now deceased, God rest his soul, & he gave me a mouthful. again, i appreciated that because since then, i've not disadvantaged a patient on the account of disagreement with another doctor.
here's the thing.....
the other day, i heard a doctor did just that - left the patient in the care of nurses when he should have been responsible himself. that brought back those memories i reminisced earlier. it reminded me of how i had neglected some of the patients that had been entrusted into my care. they served as a stark admonition for me - that when i was young, impulsive & with an atrocious attitude, i was not a doctor but a irresponsible & reckless person in a white coat. it also taught me, sometimes when i have delusions of grandeur about myself, i am actually an ordinary guy & there's nothing great about being ordinary.
i feel ordinary & i just want to rant.